


i only miss you when i'm breathing

by Livid_Writer



Category: Video Blogging RPF, Youtube RPF, escape the night - Fandom
Genre: Action/Adventure, Adventure, Best Friends, Canonical Character Death, Carnival, Character Death, Death, EtN, Everlock, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Loyalty, Major Spoilers, Temporary Character Death, also I don't use names, escape the night, especially e5 e7 and e8, it's about death ok, spoilers for all of s3, they are all the man with no name, who needs a name
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-16
Updated: 2018-08-16
Packaged: 2019-06-28 12:04:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15706878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Livid_Writer/pseuds/Livid_Writer
Summary: Rosanna loves MattMatt loves her just as much tooHe's going to miss her.





	i only miss you when i'm breathing

She looks across at him, smiling, “I love you.” She says, lights dancing in her eyes despite the darkness. He’s standing across her kitchen watching as she cleans dishes from a lovely dinner together. They watched a movie, laughing in the middle of the night with the TV illuminating their faces.

“I love you too.” He responds immediately; it’s the first time that they’ve said it but it feels right. He loves her with all of his heart, she’s his best friend and soul sister and she means the entire world and more to him. She doesn’t break eye contact or stop grinning and he doesn’t move, this is a moment to treasure even though it’s such a tiny moment. “I’ll miss you.” He adds after a second, he’s leaving town for a little while or so - a convention that she’s not going to – and he truly will, even if it’s just for a few days. She still doesn’t stop smiling, lights still waltzing around her eyes as if there’s a fire in her soul. He’s going to call her when he gets there, he promises himself, he’s going to make sure that she knows that he would never leave her behind.

           

“I love you.” She mumbles next to him in the same kitchen but months later. They’re going to start filming in a second so it’s all smiles and excitement. He’s happy to be here to help her bake (and later eat) whatever they’re going to be making despite the fact that he’s completely helpless when it comes to cake decorating.

“I love you too.” He replies once it’s over, just to let her know as if she didn’t already know that she’s one of the reasons that his heart beats every day because to him they’re just that connected. She knows though, eyes shining almost as bright as the big filming lights, and she asks him if he’d like to watch another film it’s _Harry Potter_ because of course it is, she loves magic and the wizards and witches and the good-hearted triumphing. “I’ll miss you.” He says as he leaves even though he’ll see her really soon. She’s his platonic soulmate and his life blood. He wonders if he should remind her that he really does love her but he decides not to because she always starts it and he’s not going to take away her thing.

 

She’s hugging him tightly the next time she says it, just before she heads off to some food award show that it would probably be weird for him to show up at. “I love you.” She whispers into his chest. He’s so proud of her, she deserves every second of attention that she gets because she’s worked for it, slaved for it, strived for it. He believes that she’ll win, hell, he knows she will because she’s the best at what she does.

 “I love you too.” He whispers back into her hair, just in case she’s so nervous that she forgets that she absolutely has him in her corner grinning and cheering her on with all of his might. She’s going to do great, he reminds himself as if he’s forgotten, and she’s going to look amazing on that stage collecting her award. He would give her all of the awards if he could because he wants her to remember that she deserves the entire world and whatever else he can scrape together. Even if she doesn’t win the award (and if she doesn’t something’s clearly wrong with the judges) she still needs to know that he doesn’t just love her popularity but instead he loves her personality. He’d never leave her behind. “I’ll miss you.” He reminds her, she’ll only be gone for a few hours before she comes back and they’ll either celebrate her win or commiserate her loss. Even a few hours seem like a lot of time to be separated because this is their free time goddammit and they might not meet again for a little while. “Be brave.” He adds but he knows she will because he knows her well. She’ll take the win or loss on her chin and that’s why he loves her so much.

 

They’re standing around a campfire the next time they see each other and she turns to him with a quiet “I love you” as if it’s a secret or weakness that they’re two halves of the same whole and they’re best friends. He understands though, this mission could be dangerous and she doesn’t want to put more on the line than she has to, she’s protective and he gets that, loves that.

  “I love you too.” He reminds her gently to make sure that she knows that not even a dangerous mission could drain the entire ocean of love he has for her. They’ll be fine, he just knows that, they always are. Soul sisters are inseparable and they both know that. She smiles at him and the campfire mirrors the large fire burning inside her body, embers glowing in her eyes. “I don’t want to have to miss you.” He confesses because it’s true. He doesn’t know what he’d do without her in his life but he shouldn’t have to worry about that because she’s a little fighter and he’ll protect her with everything he has and he’d never ever leave her behind. “Be brave.” He smiles back at her knowing that she will. It’s a reminder to himself as well; they’ll be just fine, he knows they will.

 

“I love you.” She says as they sit precariously on top of the Ferris Wheel staring down at an article that screams _THE CLOWNS HERE KILL_ at them. He knows she’s reminding him in case the wheel comes crashing down or the clowns continue their murder spree but he’s still confident that they’ll be fine because they just have to be because this seems too nightmarish to actually be real.

 “I love you too.” He follows up just in case she’s right. He knows that there will be some great plan that they can come up with to escape. He’s got all he needs to survive right next to him and she’s got fire burning in her eyes so he’s going to be alright. He clutches at his obnoxiously pink stuffed animal and purposefully doesn’t mention missing her because they don’t need those thoughts right now. He does add “be brave” just to make sure that she knows he’s with her all of the way to the end of tonight.

 

She rushes into his arms and says her muffled “I love you.” Into his chest again. She’s just survived her death challenge and he is so ready to exact vengeance on those who put her into that dreadful lair but he needs some time to just hold her and make sure that she truly is alive right now.

“I love you too.” He says back, almost sobbing. He nearly lost her forever because someone else didn’t pull their weight and although he’s obviously sad that someone else has died he’s more relieved that she’s here in his arms right now. “I missed you,” He tells her, loud enough so that everyone can hear so that the monsters who voted for her know that he’s coming for them with everything that he has. “You were so brave.” He mutters into her hair and he’s properly sobbing now because he can’t imagine life without his best friend and he vows to keep her safe with all of his might.

 

“I love you.” She says in tears just before he goes to fight. They both know that he’s not coming back from this and although he’s a little scared to die he’s so glad that it’s him and not her. He wants to keep her safe and far away from anything that could potentially kill her. He hopes someone else will continue his efforts but he knows that she’s strong in her own right and that she won’t just die. Like he’s about to.

"I love you.” He just has to make sure that she knows that before he dies. He wants her to know that he will die loving her and even after he dies he will continue loving her because they have a bond that doesn’t just end with death. “I’ll miss you.” He tells her, he truly will. He will miss her the second he takes a step away from her because he doesn’t want to leave her alone. “Be brave.” He implores and looks at the fire burning angrily in her eyes one last time. She’s sobbing messily and he wants to stay with her and wipe every tear away but he hopes that this last request from him will keep her fighting for her life. He’s content to miss her for a very long time if it means that she lives a long and happy life. He takes her in one last time and hopes that death won’t be as bad as he thinks that it will be.

 

“I love you.” She pretty much yells at him as he stumbles back in to the bar where they’re all sitting. He feels frail and woozy but all that he can think about is her and how she means more than he had previously thought that she did. She deserves at least three worlds, seven moons and twenty-nine galaxies and even then, he doesn’t think that he could find enough to give her to show her how much she means to him.

"I love you too.” He tells her as he collapses onto the sofa next to her. His head is pounding and spinning as if he’s at a rave but just the sight of her still breathing is enough to calm him. He doesn’t want a recap of what’s happened since he died, he doesn’t need to know where anyone went or why everyone looks so shaken up he just needs to spend a good twenty minutes staring at his best friend and relishing in a life he thought that he’d lost. “I missed you.” She nods as if she could even comprehend how much he missed her but she’s smiling and that’s all he needs to know. He turns to the room and says, “She was so brave, wasn’t she?”

 

“I love you.” She tries to calm him down but he can’t shake the feeling that they’re next. Their only other friend has been killed unfairly and the two angry victors now have vendettas against both of them and he’s not sure how long he can hold them off for. But even though she’s not smiling the lights are still flickering in her eyes. She still loves him and maybe that’s all the magic they need to live.

“I love you too.” He responds to reassure her that he’s not going to leave her to the same fate that befell their friends. He’s determined to save her at all costs and even though he hopes he can do that without any more deaths he’s willing to kill for her. “I’ll miss you.” He says and hopes that she knows that he means the innocent side of her that died tonight. They’ll still be fine, he knows they will, they can figure it out and come out stronger. “Be brave.” He reminds her in case she’s thinking of giving up.

 

She looks across at him, smiling, “I love you.” She says lights dimming in her eyes with the darkness. For a second he’s standing across her kitchen watching as she cleans dishes from a lovely dinner together; they’ve just watched a movie, laughing in the middle of the night with the TV illuminating their faces and it’s the first time they’ve said it to each other instead of the last.

“I love you too.” He’s trying to remain calm, sound comforting but he loves her with all of his heart, she’s his best friend and soul sister and she means the entire world and more to him and he can’t bear to see her go. He’ll remember this moment forever, it will haunt every remaining minute of his life. “I’ll miss you.” He truly will, she’s leaving forever to somewhere where he can’t follow her anymore. She still doesn’t stop smiling, lights slowing their waltz around her eyes as if the fire in her soul is dying. This feels worse than death. “Be brave.” They both know that their final moment of bravery will be shared, just like every other moment of their friendship. They maintain eye contact and don’t move and he remembers every time that they’ve shared this exchange. This will be their last moment together. She is dragged away. He remembers how much she loved Harry Potter. Screams pierce the air.

 

 


End file.
